Missing the one that left.

I have been thinking a lot recently about my ex wife. Being an ex husband is something I never wanted to be. 
Communication on both sides was our biggest fault. Both for different reasons, but neither a good explanation for why we are where we are.
I was angry and frustrated when she said she wanted to separate.  I had gone through many personal issues that I was trying to overcome.  I was getting better and being a better man.
But now I find myself nearly two years later still thinking of her every day. I think very fondly of her even though I know all her faults. I still want to talk to her and see her every day. But I have not heard back from her nor do I expect to hear from ever again.
I write in this because I know very few or if anyone ever reads it anyway.  I also just don't want to hear again how I should move on and get over her. But I also want to vent. I need to let this silently but publicly out.
I do miss her. I would take her back in a heartbeat.  I have girls I currently talk to that I would cut off all contact with if she wanted to be with me and only me again. But do I honestly think that will happen? No. She has moved on and I am the one who has not. Sure I have dated. Sure I have done things with friends and family since then that I have found joy in life. But that does not mean that she has ever left my thoughts or heart, no.
But life is not fair. Not only does life make things hard. We as people make things even harder on ourselves and others. We do selfish things. I did that and she did. We give up so easily on things that mean the world to us. This only makes us sad.
I don't want to be sad. I want to be happy. I am going to do the things I know I need to do to be happy and that does not always include others getting their way. I don't need to be selfish, but I need to stop being a push over and so dependant on others.